I knew very well that I was not giving it up. I was hanging on, as so many of us do, to some small part of it, to a part so small it seems a mere token, nothing dangerous, a talisman of sickness, kept in the pocket, rubbed between finger and thumb. I told myself it would be alright, just hanging on to this little bit. And I knew, in the back of my mind, that it would not.
Marya Hornbacher (Wasted)